Chants & Chairs

A word of warning: this is a pretty long post (I know, aren't they all?) so best settle in with a cup of tea :-)

As you could probably tell from my previous post, the unrelenting schedule of ashram life tends to result in one day being quite indistinguishable from the next. Fridays are different because they are "free days", but really the only other excitement for the week (apart from when the boutique restocks its supply of coconut balls) is the Saturday night talent show.

Those who know me well are fully aware of how much I love the sound of my own voice, so it should come as little surprise that I was unable to resist the lure of the microphone on talent show night.

To set the scene, by Saturday morning the number of people who had signed up to perform at the show was zero. This lead the Ashram director to declare that if there was no talent show he would be forced to give us a long boring lecture instead. This was how I decided that maybe I should spend my precious few hours of free time knocking up a chant about how I was coping with ashram life.

I performed the chant below on my first Saturday night and it detailed how I felt on my second day at the ashram. It was performed in a call and response style so everyone had to join in.

Ashram Life

By Bernadette Wilson

A chant to the tune of the daily chant at the Sivananda Vedanta Ashram at Neyyar Dam Kerala.

1. Bell rings, wake Enjoy satsang in the dark. Bell rings, wake Enjoy satsang in the dark. 2.Sit & meditate, chant & pray My legs have gone numb. Sit & meditate, chant & pray My legs have gone numb. 3.Oh when is tea time? When is tea time?! Why didn’t I eat more At dinner last night? 4. Prayana, asana, Get your body to move. Prayana, asana, Get your body to move. 5. The only pose I’m good at Is savanasa. The only pose I’m good at Is savanasa. (NB* Savanasa is the "corpse pose". You just lie on your mat like you are dead :-) 6. Who knew it was possible To sweat this much?! Who knew it was possible To sweat this much?! 7. Cross-legged eating Use your right hand. Cross-legged eating Use your right hand. 8. Oh no! They’ve run out Of sweet delicious rice. There’s never enough Of that sweet delicious rice. 9. Oh joy! Joy! Joy! Now we have free time. Oh joy! Joy! Joy! Now we have free time. 10. Library, internet, boutique, Or health hut? Library, internet, boutique, Or health hut? 11.Tea time by the tree, The best part of the day! Tea time by the tree, The best part of the day! 12. The lecture would be better If my legs weren’t so numb. The lecture would be better If my legs weren’t so numb. 13. Afternoon yoga, Practice, practice! Afternoon yoga, Practice, practice! 14. Why can’t mosquitoes Be vegetarian?! Why can’t mosquitoes Be vegetarian?! 15. It’s hard to “just relax” Getting eaten alive. It’s hard to “just relax” Getting eaten alive. 16. Cold shower, feel clean For about an hour. Cold shower, feel clean For about an hour. 17. Dinner, remember 16 Hours til the next meal. Dinner, remember 16 Hours til the next meal. 18. Oh joy! Joy! Joy! Evening free time.  Joy! Joy! Joy! Evening free time. 19. Library, internet, boutique, Or health hut? Library, internet, boutique, Or health hut? 20. (Slow)  Evening satsang, Time to contemplate. Evening satsang, Time to contemplate. 21. I am devoted, Devoted to chairs. I am devoted, Devoted to chairs. 22. Chair! Chair! Chair! My kingdom for a chair! Chair! Chair! Chair! My kingdom for a chair! 23. Sivananda, Sivananda, Sivananda! Sivananda, Sivananda, Sivananda! 24. Ashram life is good, Once you get used to it. Ashram life is good, Once you get used to it. 25. But I’m in pain! I’m in pain! Pain absolute, Pain I am. 26. (slow) When the pain is gone I’ll feel bliss absolute. Bliss, bliss, bliss, Bliss absolute.

The chant went over very well with the audience. So well in fact that for days afterwards people were approaching me to tell me how much they liked the chant and to ask for a copy of the words. 

I think there were three reasons why the chant was so well received. Firstly, the audience was relieved someone did something for the talent show so that they were off the hook. Secondly, they identified all too well with the themes of the chant. And, finally, people at an ashram are so full of love that you will never find a more supportive audience!

I performed the chant again on my second Saturday night at the ashram and added the verses below:

27. Week 2 at the ashram
and things are looking up.
Week 2 at the ashram
and things are looking up.

28. Serving brunch has improved
my forward bend.
Serving brunch has improved 

my forward bend.

29. My abs are stronger
I can even do a shoulder stand.
My abs are stronger
I can even do a shoulder stand.

30. I am devoted
Devoted to oil massage!
I am devoted
Devoted to oil massage!

31. The only thing better,
Is the hot shower afterwards.
The only thing better,

Is the hot shower afterwards.

32. Krishna got married
and we had a big feast.
Krishna got married
and we had a big feast.

33. When you want help with romance
you don't think of an ashram.

When you want help with romance

you don't think of an ashram.

34. But my cloth got blessed,
Now Krishna's finding me a husband!
But my cloth got blessed,
Now Krishna's finding me a husband!

35. We saw films about
Vishu - Devananda.
We saw films about
Vishu - Devananda.

(NB* Swami Vishnu - Devananda brought Swami Sivananda's teachings to the west and established many ashrams around the world)

36. I loved seeing his peace plane
and him in a hammock.
I loved seeing his peace plane
and him in a hammock.

37. Ashram life is good
When you actively participate.
Ashram life is good
When you actively participate.

38. Surrender to the schedule
and pick up a tambourine!
Surrender to the schedule
and pick up a tambourine!

39. (Slow) Sivananda ashram
Thanks for all you've given me.
Sivananda ashram
Thanks for all you've given me.

40. (Slow) Mindfulness, community
and an addiction to coconut balls.
Mindfulness, community
and an addiction to coconut balls.

The new verses to the chant were well received, though the audience vibe was very different to the first week. Two hundred people had arrived at the ashram on that day, for the month long teacher training course, and they were definitely more subdued than the yoga vacation crowd. 

Writing and performing the chant was a hugely positive experience for me. Not only did it allow me an outlet for my emotions, but it really helped to connect me to the ashram community.

Ashram Agony

I never considered myself to be the type of person who would stay in an ashram. 


The very word "ashram"conjured up a group of associations in my mind that I had zero desire to align myself with. I imagined an isolated location, lots of prayers, and people handing over their sanity - along with their bank balances - to gurus of questionable authority. I imagined people hallucinating on LSD and declaring that they had "found themselves". People who went to ashrams, I unfairly imagined, were blind followers. And though my eyesight may be poor, I have never considered myself to be a blind follower.


So how on earth did I just end up spending two weeks at the Sivananda Yoga Vedanta Dhanwantari Ashram at Neyyar Dam in Kerala?


Well, the seed was planted by a lovely English traveler called Rosie who I met in Beirut, Lebanon in April. When she heard I was planning to visit Kerala later in the year, she insisted that I visit the ashram at Neyyar Dam. I was so resistant to the notion, that I didn't even fully listen to her as she raved about delicious vegetarian food, cheap accommodation and great yoga lessons. I even recall trying to politely rebuff her good intentions by saying, "it sounds great, but an ashram's not really my style".


Rosie could tell I was not buying and the conversation moved on. When she left the dorm a few days later however, she left a note with the details of the ashram under my pillow. The note said something to the effect of, "just look it up on the internet before you dismiss it". A big thank you to Rosie, because without her persistence I certainly wouldn't have just spent two weeks improving my health and quietening my mind.


For those of you who are interested here is the link to the ashram:
http://www.sivananda.org/neyyardam/default.htm


I decided that, as I wanted to get healthier, the yoga vacation program would be a good place to start. The ashram had a minimum stay requirement of three days and I kept repeating that as my mantra in the weeks leading up to my arrival. My thinking was, even if it is horrible I only have to stay three days - so how bad could it be?


I knew that my body was not ready for twice daily yoga classes, so while in Sydney I started attending yoga classes a few times a weeks to prepare. I started telling family and friends about this yoga retreat so that they would hold me accountable if I backed out at the last moment. I needed that push because everything about staying at the ashram terrified me.


Ashram life was not just "out of my comfort zone". Ashram life was at least a twenty hour flight away from comfort zone! I was definitely most afraid of the physical pain that would result from 4 hours of yoga a day, but really everything from the twice daily meditation sessions to the fact that they only served two meals a day freaked me out.


Anyway, on the 31st of October I finally sucked up my courage and took a taxi from Trivandrum to the ashram. The superb setting of the ashram, amid 12 acres of tropical forest with cool green coconut tree groves, a nearby lake and colourful flower-filled views, did much to alleviate my anxiety. Within a few hours I was swept up in the daily schedule of ashram life which I have detailed below:


5:20am - Wake up bell


6:00am - Morning Satsang (30 min silent meditation, 40 min chanting, 10min talk on a spiritual theme and 10 minutes of prayers).


7:30am - Tea 


8:00am - Asana (yoga) class for 2 hours


10:00am - Brunch (this was also my karma yoga duty  - like a daily chore - while at the ashram. So I left yoga at 9:50 to set up mats/trays/ cups in the dining hall. I then went around serving food. Following that, I ate for 10 min and then I had to clean up, sweep the hall, mop the hall, empty bins etc. The whole process went until 11:15)


11:15am - Free time


1:30pm - Tea & snack


2:00pm - Lecture on one of the five points of yoga for 1 and a half hours (Proper exercise, proper breathing, proper diet, proper relaxation & positive thinking/meditation)


3:30pm - Asana (yoga) class for 2 hours


6:00pm - Dinner


6:30pm - Free time


8:00pm - Evening Satsang (30 min silent meditation, 40 min chanting, 10min talk on a spiritual theme and 10 minutes of prayers).


9:30pm - Free time


10:30pm - Lights out


Predictably, by day two I was in sheer agony. 


Every muscle, tendon, atom of my body hurt. Though the yoga classes were the main culprit, it was actually all the sitting cross legged that I found the most unbearable. By the time you add satsangs, lectures, meals to the portions of the yoga lessons that we spent cross legged -  I was averaging about 5 and a half hours of cross legged action each day.  


My course started on a Tuesday and I was just willing myself to get to Friday, because Fridays at the ashram are "free days". This means on Fridays you only have to attend morning and evening satsangs. Most people use this opportunity to leave the ashram on lovely day trips to the nearby beaches of Kovalam or Varkala. I was planning on using my "free day" to lie flat on my back sleeping or sitting on a chair reading. But, the universe had other plans and I spent most of my "free day" in the bathroom with a lovely case of traveler's diarrhea.


Still, I soldiered on and when I awoke on day five to only moderate pain - I knew things were on the up. By day 6, I was almost pain free and able to start appreciating the benefits that ashram life was delivering to me. 


There was noticeable improvement in my strength and flexibility during yoga practice, my mind was calmer and I was actually looking forward to meditation sessions. The biggest change, however, was that I had got to know a number of my fellow yoga vacationers and I began to feel a real sense of community. Just like soldiers  who are forever bonded by their experiences on the battlefield, I think that the yoga vacationers who stayed beyond the pain of the first week also forged life-long bonds. No one else will ever fully understand the joy of finally mastering the plough posture nor our new found appreciation for chairs, hot water or coconut balls. 


Another part of ashram life I found surprisingly enjoyable was the chanting. Though I often didn't understand what we were chanting about, I definitely appreciated the positive vibrations of the Sanskrit words as well as the amazing sense of community you feel when a hundred people are chanting together in unison. I enjoyed the chanting so much that by the second week I was frequently picking up a tambourine. I even wrote a humorous chant about ashram life for the Saturday night talent show. The words to that chant will form the next post.


That's it for now. 


Om tat sat. Om, shanti, shanti, shanti....